Leave Me Not
by ninasdreams
Summary: K/A When Athrun blacks out after the battle at Orb, Kira comes face to face with the realization that he may lose his best friend without ever telling him his most important secret. *Takes place during GSD*
1. Chapter 1

Leave Me Not

Meyrin's POV

I watched Athrun's face take on a look of fierce determination as we stood in front of the new mobile suit, Infinite Justice. Something about Miss Lacus's words had touched something inside of him, clearing the doubt that had taken root at the Chairman's betrayal. I did not fully comprehend her words of his reactions, because I did not completely understand Athrun's previous and current situations. But the greatest mystery to me was his reaction to her mention of Kira.

What was it about this Kira's words that caused his eyes to widen so? Why was it that out of everything Lacus said, her relay of Kira's confidence in him caused Athrun to tremble with an emotion I couldn't hope to identify?

Whatever it was, I watched as Athrun made up his mind and suited up despite his injuries, climbing into the Justice without any hint of hesitation to launch head on into the fray.

Murrue's POV

_He must have a death wish! _I thought in shock as Zala launched into battle in the Justice. The young man was still recovering from near fatal injuries, and already he was throwing himself back into the chaos.

If Lacus had not emphatically told (I refuse to be commanded) for me to let him go, I would have never allowed such a rash action. But I could not refuse her. When Kira and Athrun were involved, there was always a gleam in her eyes, as if there was a subtle complex mystery between the two friends that only she could unravel.

I turned my attention to commanding the Archangel instead, almost missing the timid girl from the Minerva standing silently behind Lacus, observing the Freedom and Justice with apprehension.

Kira's POV

I heaved a sigh of relief as the Minerva signaled the retreat. Orb was safe…for the moment. I glanced at the Justice hovering a small distance from me.

I couldn't deny that I was overjoyed to have Athrun fighting beside me once more. The de javu of crossing blades as enemies was an excruciating experience, one I had hoped we'd never need to go through again after the first war. Now, rejoined in battle as allies, I could feel a great weight lift from my heart.

But that didn't erase the concern I felt at the moment. I knew Athrun was nowhere near full strength. After the injuries he'd suffered, he should've remained bedridden for at least a week. At this rate, he could aggravate the still healing wounds.

I watched in terror as the Infinite Justice unexpectedly went limp and began to plummet towards the ocean below.

"ATHRUN!" I yelled as I urged the Freedom into action, speeding forward to catch the crimson mobile suit. It was a close call as I managed to grab hold. My heart beat wildly against my chest as the Archangel surfaced below us, allowing me to dock with all haste.

Once inside the Archangel, I quickly made my way to Athrun's cockpit, ignoring the worried crowd gathering below. I soon had the cockpit open, revealing Athrun's still, unconscious form. My heart sped up as I lowered us both to the floor below amidst the concerned crew members. It was evident that something was very wrong.

I laid Athrun flat on his back as he momentarily came to. I could sense someone hovering behind me, though I didn't recognize her. My heart dropped as I hastily removed his helmet. Athrun muttered my name briefly, eyes unfocused, before slipping back into unconsciousness.

I was horrorstruck by the sight before me. The unfamiliar girl behind me gasped softly. Blood ran freely from beneath the bandage wrapped around his head, obscuring most of his face. I anxiously unzipped his flight soon, and I couldn't suppress my sharp intake of breath as my eyes beheld the crimson liquid that drenched his chest and shoulder.

"Someone get a stretcher!" I yelled desperately. "I need a medic!"

I looked on numbly as my commands were rapidly carried out. _Please, Athrun…_I thought brokenly…_please don't die._


	2. Chapter 2

**a/n: Thank you to everyone who has reviewed, and thank you all for your patience. I lost access to for a while there but now that I have it back, I am updating this story first as a special thank you. Enjoy the rest of the story!**

**Disclaimer: Gundam Seed isn't mine. And I don't have a beta, so all mistakes are mine.**

* * *

Leave Me Not Pt.2

Kira's POV

I sat in the Archangel's infirmary, keeping silent vigil over Athrun's now slumbering form. The image of my best friend soaked in his own blood had left me badly shaken. Although the doctor said he'd be fine if he didn't strain himself, I couldn't prevent myself from dwelling on how close I'd just come, not once but twice, to losing him.

The memory of our near fatal confrontation during the last war rose unbidden to the surface. Even now, I could remember the sorrow and the pain of not knowing his fate. When Lacus orchestrated our reunion, my relief was profound. After the destruction of G.E.N.E.S.I.S. and Lacus' call for a ceasefire, I'd believed I would never have to feel such excruciating pain again.

Turns out I was wrong.

The agony that replaced my astonishment when Kisaka brought Athrun to us a few days ago, inches from death, was a whole new level of suffering. The days that followed were trying, and I could do nothing but remain at his bedside and pray that he would survive, that he would be alright. When the doctor finally said he was stable, I almost burst into tears.

Even now, looking upon his sleeping features, I felt a lump rise in my throat. It was shortly after the war when I felt my feelings begin to shift. I felt as if there was something missing, an empty space reserved for the person I loved. I had thought that person to be Lacus, and yet no matter how much time we spent together I remained incomplete.

I think she understood my heart's desires long before I did. She guided me while we enjoyed the peace our sacrifices had won us. Lacus, with her patience and gentle coxing, showed me the truth. I felt a bit embarrassed when I realized how oblivious I'd been these many years.

I was in love. And the center of my affections was none other than my best friend, Athrun Zala.

I brushed back an azure lock from his face. He'd been in this unresponsive state nearly four days, a long time for a coordinator. And a small part of me, the one that I struggled to keep repressed, feared that he might not wake this time around.

I leaned forward, lips almost brushing the shell of his ear. I could feel the sting of oncoming tears. "I love you, Athrun. Please…please come back to me," came my choked whisper.

Athrun's POV

Endless darkness. Thick and suffocating, wrapped around me. Where am I? What happened?

I feel as if I'm drifting through timeless space. I can see something ahead, a light. It's drawing closer, spreading to transform the darkness.

Memories. I can see my mother softly singing a lullaby to help me sleep. I want to reach out to her, to embrace her after all these years, even if only in memory. But as I approach she grows farther and farther until soon I am running, desperately with hand outstretched when suddenly…I am on the PLANTS standing in front of her grave. I fall to my knees, tears pricking the corners of my eyes.

The scene dissolves into another and my breath catches in my throat. There sits Nicol, his fingers dancing lightly over the piano's ebony and ivory keys as we laugh together. I recognize the melody. _Rhapsody of Tranquility_ he'd called it, a piece he composed for the day the war finally ended. The sight ripples and I am in the hall outside his room, the pages of his sheet music strewn upon the cold floor, never to be played again. I can feel my throat constrict, as the pain of losing him bubbles to the surface once more while the memory fades.

In its place is one I know so well, Kira and me standing together beneath the blossoming trees as children. I see the undying kinship mixed with sadness in our younger faces, knowing we must part for a time. As Birdie hops from my small hands into little Kira's cupped palms, I cannot suppress the longing I feel for simpler times, untouched by sorrows and the horrors of war.

The pictures begin to pass in a dizzying whirl, each recollection of Kira flashing by. They pause for a moment, and a wordless cry passes my lips. This memory is still too fresh, too painful to watch. I am once again staring at the monitor on the Minerva as Shinn shoots down Kira. I know that he is still alive, but the remembered agony of believing Kira dead for the third time is too much.

As tears cascade down my cheeks, I cannot help but admit…Kira is my world. I love him, more than I have ever loved any other.

Meyrin's POV

Lacus and I rushed into the infirmary when we heard Kira call out for help. The pain in his amethyst eyes almost brought me to my knees. Never have I seen such agony reflected within a single gaze.

The machine monitoring Athrun's vitals was beeping wildly, his pulse galloping. When I glanced at his face I was alarmed to see tears streaming, although he remained in his comatose state.

"I don't know what's wrong!" Kira panicked. "How do I help him?"

I watched as Lacus placed a reassuring hand on Kira's shoulder. "Just comfort him," she instructed gently. "Calm him."

Kira nodded wordlessly. I couldn't help noticing how gentle Kira was as he took Athrun's hand in his own, brushing strands of hair from Athrun's pale face. He spoke to Athrun soothingly, with a tenderness usually reserved for lovers.

I gave a sigh of relief as Athrun's heartbeat began returning to normal.

Lacus tugged softly on my arm, and we silently left the room. But I couldn't help lingering just outside the door, gazing at the two young men.

Athrun's POV

I can hear a tender voice, soothing away the torment and grief assailing me. It is faint at first, a gentle murmur floating in the vast darkness.

_It's okay…I…Athrun_, I'm soon able to make out. Still I remain enveloped in shadow; the woe of memories reawakened clings tightly to my heart.

The voice is closer now, the soothing whispers easier to decipher.

_You're safe now. I won't let anything or anyone else hurt you._

I know that earnest voice. Kira? Why does he sound so upset when I'm right here?

_Orb, the Archangel…everyone's safe._

I can feel the tears that have been falling begin to subside at his assurances and suddenly, it comes back to me. Escaping Durandal and being shot down by Shinn. The attack on Orb, the Infinite Justice, blacking out after the Minerva's retreat. How long have I been out?

_Please come back to me, Athrun…I need you._

I want to reach out to him, to follow his voice and assure him that I could never abandon him. But I can't find my voice. The sudden onslaught of weakness shocks me, as if my body has been pushed to its limit.

But I keep fighting towards consciousness with what little strength I can summon. He has to know, I have to see him again.

Kira…

Kira's POV

I felt my muscles release their tension as Athrun's tears slowed, his heart returning to a calm rhythm. Despite this immense relief, I felt the tears that had been accumulating in my eyes begin to fall. Tears of anger towards the people who kept manipulating Athrun, exploiting his simple desire for the wars to give way to peace. Tears of regret as the small part of me I refused to acknowledge whispered that I might lose Athrun, without ever having confessed my secret.

"K-Kira…"

At first I thought I was imagining the weak voice that whispered my name.

"Kira…"

This time I looked down at Athrun, daring to hope. Glazed emerald eyes gazed up at me blearily. I couldn't decide if I wanted to keep crying or cheer. The tears came harder anyway.

"Athrun?" I asked shakily.

He smiled weakly. "You really are a crybaby, Kira."

I laughed, relief coursing through me. He was going to be alright. I gently laid a hand on his shoulder. "You had us all terrified for a while there," I told him. I looked away as I painfully added, "I was afraid you wouldn't wake up."

A gentle hand rested on my cheek, brushing away my own slowing tears as I looked back at my best friend. "I—"

"I have no intention of leaving you, Kira," he interrupted softly. "I need you too."

I was confused for a moment. When did I say…?

"You heard me?" I asked in disbelief as the answer clicked.

He looked at me with a small smile, trying to hide some of the pain as he answered, "It felt like I was being smothered. At first everything was just…black." He paused for a moment, his stunning eyes darkening considerably before he continued, "Then the memories came. Everyone I'd loved and lost. Mom, Nicol…you. It felt like I was drowning. It was your voice that helped me resurface."

I looked at the person in front me for a long moment. I had nearly lost him this time. The enormity of that fact caused my heart to skip a beat.

Now I had a second chance, and I had no desire to waste it.

"Athrun…" I started, pausing for a moment to strengthen my resolve before continuing. "I-I love you."

He looked at me, silent for what seemed like an eternity and I rushed on, unable to bear the silence and the intensity of his gaze.

"IknowIshould'vetoldyousooner, butIwasafraidyou'dbedisgustedandneverspeaktomeand—"

His fingers on my lips stopped the panicked flurry of words.

"It's alright, Kira," he assured me with a small chuckle. "I love you too."

I stood there, shocked, unable to let myself believe that I could have this chance at unparalleled happiness. "B-But Cagalli," I stammered.

Another chuckle. "She knows," he told me. "She knew long before I was really ready to admit it to myself. She can be really perceptive."

And finally I let myself accept what I was hearing. "You love me?"

He laughed, pain forgotten for a moment. He weakly pulled me forward and our lips met for the first time. It wasn't long or passionate, but it was the greatest moment of my life.

"You own my heart and soul, Kira Yamato," he whispered as we broke apart. "Forever."

Meyrin's POV

I could feel my eyes widen at their soft-spoken confessions. The crew of the Archangel had told me that Athrun and Kira were best friends, but I hadn't realized…

They were in love?

And abruptly, everything made sense to me. I hadn't been able to understand what had brought on the heart-rending reaction in Athrun when Shinn had shot Kira down. Nor had I been capable of comprehending the affect Lacus's message from Kira had had on Athrun.

Now I knew. They cared for each other with a passion and intensity that I could only hope to one day experience.

"Their bond has always been strong," Lacus said lightly, startling me. She smiled. "I believe their hearts have been intertwined since they first met as children."

A new voice joined the conversation, and I looked to see Lady Cagalli had joined us. "It's good to see the two of them finally happy," she said, eyes soft and shining with affection. "I know they'll get through this war together."

Lacus nodded in agreement as I remained silent. "Then they may finally be able to live their lives."

Cagalli smiled. "A life of love instead of war."

She and Lacus turned and began to leave.

"They deserve it," I heard Cagalli whisper as I glanced one more time at the two newfound lovers.

They looked…for this short moment in time…content and incandescently happy.


End file.
